QUOTATIONS: SIMON VS THE HOMOSAPIENS AGENDA
CHAPTER 1
"You should be who you are." - Martin page 3
"And I don't think I 've ever been so ready for someone to leave." - Simon page 5
"Talking to them is more exhausting than keeping a blog." - Simon page 6
"Secrets don't exist." - Simon page 8
CHAPTER 2
"I don't care who you are. Puberty is merciless." - Simon page 12
"Remember the way people would look at you blankly and say, "Um, okaaay," after you finished talking? Everyone just had to make it so clear that, whatever you were thinking or feeling, you were totally alone." - Blue page 14
"It's really amazing, isn't it? Someone can trigger sexual identity crisis and, not have a clue they're doing it." - Blue page 15
CHAPTER 3
"It's strange, because in reality, I'm not the leading guy. Maybe I'm the best friend." - Simon page 19
"Nothing is worse than the secret humiliation of being insulted by proxy." - Simon page 24
"But music is always better than no music." - Simon page 28
"Never in my life have I underestimated someone so severely." - Simon page 29
CHAPTER 4
"Don't you realize you're throwing away the perfect opportunity to be someone else for an evening." - Simon (Jacques) page 36
CHAPTER 5
"I have a hard time getting into other people's head sometimes. It's probably the worst thing about me." - Simon page 41
"I know this is weird, but I make my bed every single day, even though the rest of my room is a hellscape of paper and laundry and books and clutter. Sometimes I feel like my bed is a lifeboat." - Simon page 54
"But I'm tired of coming out. All I ever do is come out. I try not to change, but I keep changing, in all these tiny ways. I get a girlfriend. I have a beer. And every freaking time, I have to reintroduce myself to the universe all over again." - Simon page 56
CHAPTER 6
"Do you ever feel locked into yourself? I'm not sure if I'm making sense here. I guess what I mean is that sometimes it seems like everyone knows who I am except me." - Simon (Jacques) page 59
"It's more that I want to leap in and say certain things and do certain things, but I always seem to hold myself back. I think a big part of me is afraid." - Blue page 60
"There's something about you that makes me want to open up, and that's slightly terrifying for me." - Blue page 61
CHAPTER 7
"It feels like anything could happen." - Simon page 70
"It's sort of nice not to have to be cynical for a change." - Simon page 72
"I guess it feels like I'm a part of something." - Simon page 72
CHAPTER 8
CHAPTER 9
"People are shameless when it comes to cake." - Simon page 84
"Sometimes I forget how nice it is to just sit back and watch things." - Simon page 85
CHAPTER 10
"Do you ever have those random rights where your brain won't shut off, even though your body feels like five hundred pounds of exhausted." - Simon (Jacques) page 87
CHAPTER 11
"Everything is a little more perfect when she's here." - Simon page 95
"I think I may be on my way to feeling better." - Simon page 100
"It just feels like I'm on the outside somehow. Not all the time. Just sometimes. But yeah. I feel irrelevant. I hate that." - Simon page 101
CHAPTER 12
"I mean, you're not crazy. I think you're awesome." - Simon (Jacques) page 104
CHAPTER 13
"Seriously? That asshole deserves to feel miserable." - Simon page 110
CHAPTER 14
"Why is it so much easier talking about this stuff with you?" - Blue page 117
CHAPTER 15
CHAPTER 16
"A part of me feels like I jumped over some kind of border, and now I'm on the other side realizing I can't cross back." - Simon (Jacques) page 128
"Once you come out, you can't really go back in. It's a little bit terrifying, isn't it?" - Blue page 129
CHAPTER 17
CHAPTER 18
CHAPTER 19
"I want it to feel how it used to feel." - Simon page 157
"It's like nothing about me is allowed to change." - Simon page 162
"But I'm so exhausted and unhappy right now." - Simon page 164
CHAPTER 20
CHAPTER 21
"I don't have a right to be mad." - Leah page 179
"But you're entitled to your emotions." - Simon page 179
CHAPTER 22
"I'm just not ready for you to know who I am." - Blue page 184
"But I can't think of a way for that to happen without everything changing. I think I'm scared to lose you. Does that make sense? Don't hate me." - Blue page 184
CHAPTER 23
"I'm just so sick of straight people who can't get their shit together." - Simon page 189
"I'm supposed to decide when and where and who knows how I want to say it. So, yeah, you took that from me." - Simon page 196
CHAPTER 24
"Do you ever get so angry you start crying? And do you ever feel guilty for getting angry? Tell me I'm not weird." - Simon (Jacques) page 199
CHAPTER 25
CHAPTER 26
"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I really do understand if you don't find me attractive or whatever. I'll get over it. But you're kind of my best friend in a lot of ways, and I really want to keep you, can we just pretend none of this ever happened and go back to normal?" - Simon page 209
CHAPTER 27
"I shouldn't care if stupid people call me a stupid word, and I shouldn't care what people think of me. But I always care." - Simon page 220
CHAPTER 28
CHAPTER 29
"I mean, it's cool. But next time you guys decide to all hang out without me, text me with some pictures or something. Just so I can pretend I still have friends." - Leah page 245
CHAPTER 30
"But you don't get to make the decisions about my love life. I choose who I date." - Abby page 253
"I'm the one who's miserable." - Simon page 254
"Because who you like can't be forced or persuaded or manipulated. If any one knows that, it's me." - Simon page 255
"I'm a shitty friend." - Simon page 255
"But I think I'm falling for him again." - Simon page 256
CHAPTER 31
CHAPTER 32
CHAPTER 33
"And I can't stop smiling. I mean, there are times when it's actually more work not to smile." - Simon page 277
"But I could never replace you." - Simon page 283
"You guys know me better than anyone. You know me too well." - Simon page 284
"It's like the longer you sit with some shit, the harder it is to talk about." - Leah page 285
CHAPTER 34
CHAPTER 35
"And if this is what it's like having a boyfriend, I don't know why in God's name I waited so long." - Simon page 291
"People really are like houses with vast rooms and tiny windows. And maybe it's a good thing, the way he never stop surprising each other." - Simon page 293
"Why would I watch other people kissing when I could be kissing you." - Simon page 302
THE VERY FIRST SIMON-BLUE EMAILS
"I guess I'm thinking it could be nice to talk with someone who can relate to how I'm feeling." - Blue page 312
"It's so much easier to be open with someone who doesn't know you at all." - Simon (Jacques) page 317
"I think you're lonely, right? Me too." - Simon (Jacques) page 319
"Have you ever had that experience where you're writing something and it just pours out of you with no effort? It's so strange when that happens. It almost feels like the words already exist, and you're just transcribing them." - Blue page 320
"I can't believe the things people are willing to share about themselves." - Blue page 321
CHAPTER 21
"I don't have a right to be mad." - Leah page 179
"But you're entitled to your emotions." - Simon page 179
CHAPTER 22
"I'm just not ready for you to know who I am." - Blue page 184
"But I can't think of a way for that to happen without everything changing. I think I'm scared to lose you. Does that make sense? Don't hate me." - Blue page 184
CHAPTER 23
"I'm just so sick of straight people who can't get their shit together." - Simon page 189
"I'm supposed to decide when and where and who knows how I want to say it. So, yeah, you took that from me." - Simon page 196
CHAPTER 24
"Do you ever get so angry you start crying? And do you ever feel guilty for getting angry? Tell me I'm not weird." - Simon (Jacques) page 199
CHAPTER 25
CHAPTER 26
"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I really do understand if you don't find me attractive or whatever. I'll get over it. But you're kind of my best friend in a lot of ways, and I really want to keep you, can we just pretend none of this ever happened and go back to normal?" - Simon page 209
CHAPTER 27
"I shouldn't care if stupid people call me a stupid word, and I shouldn't care what people think of me. But I always care." - Simon page 220
CHAPTER 28
CHAPTER 29
"I mean, it's cool. But next time you guys decide to all hang out without me, text me with some pictures or something. Just so I can pretend I still have friends." - Leah page 245
CHAPTER 30
"But you don't get to make the decisions about my love life. I choose who I date." - Abby page 253
"I'm the one who's miserable." - Simon page 254
"Because who you like can't be forced or persuaded or manipulated. If any one knows that, it's me." - Simon page 255
"I'm a shitty friend." - Simon page 255
"But I think I'm falling for him again." - Simon page 256
CHAPTER 31
CHAPTER 32
CHAPTER 33
"And I can't stop smiling. I mean, there are times when it's actually more work not to smile." - Simon page 277
"But I could never replace you." - Simon page 283
"You guys know me better than anyone. You know me too well." - Simon page 284
"It's like the longer you sit with some shit, the harder it is to talk about." - Leah page 285
CHAPTER 34
CHAPTER 35
"And if this is what it's like having a boyfriend, I don't know why in God's name I waited so long." - Simon page 291
"People really are like houses with vast rooms and tiny windows. And maybe it's a good thing, the way he never stop surprising each other." - Simon page 293
"Why would I watch other people kissing when I could be kissing you." - Simon page 302
THE VERY FIRST SIMON-BLUE EMAILS
"I guess I'm thinking it could be nice to talk with someone who can relate to how I'm feeling." - Blue page 312
"It's so much easier to be open with someone who doesn't know you at all." - Simon (Jacques) page 317
"I think you're lonely, right? Me too." - Simon (Jacques) page 319
"Have you ever had that experience where you're writing something and it just pours out of you with no effort? It's so strange when that happens. It almost feels like the words already exist, and you're just transcribing them." - Blue page 320
"I can't believe the things people are willing to share about themselves." - Blue page 321
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